All of my children are completely different. They each have their own unique personality, interests, quirks, preferences…you name it…they are not the same! I love that about them! I encourage them to be themselves, be proud of who they are, stand up for what they believe. I want them to be able to think for themselves and stand up for what’s right and be strong against peer pressure. Most of all, I don’t want them to ever think they need to blend into the background or that they don’t have a voice…
Sometimes that backfires on me…
My youngest, for example, is very much my little mini-me. She’s strong-minded with a quick wit and a sarcastic sense of humor. These characteristics are hard for a child to learn to balance on the side of funny and not cross the line to rude. Actually, it’s difficult for most adults to master that trade! Today, she was teetering more on the side of “talking back” and less on the side of “comedic anecdotes”.
So…time for some momsense!
Nope, not that simple…
Trying to explain to a very smart 9-year-old the difference between “having an opinion” and “talking back” is not an easy task! Her points are completely valid! There really isn’t a difference between putting laundry away now or later. I just want it done now. Why? Because I do! So…what now…tell her to just stop thinking logically and listen to the completely irrational woman telling her to do things for no particular reason at all and disregard everything that woman has ever taught her about having a strong mind?
Hmmmm. This was obviously not going to go in my favor.
So, I told her she’s right and I’m proud of her for thinking so logically!
Wait for it……….
THEN, we had a talk about learning to control what comes out of her mouth and what stays in her head…especially if it’s not a logical thought, but more of an exasperated “mom, you’re driving me nuts” thought. (Yes, no matter how great we think we are doing at this mom thing…our kids are thinking “you drive me nuts”. But, we aren’t doing our job, if they weren’t!)
So, when your own words of advice come back to bite ya in the butt, just run with it… and pretend that you knew what you were doing all along!